We’ve talked a lot about Denver’s joining the West Coast Conference (WCC), but we have never identified the Pioneers’ primary rival(s). We laid out a  few thoughts below on our new WCC mates. Vote on the school you think should be DU’s biggest rival. Denver officially joined the conference July 1st and hosts their first conference matchup in any sport tonight, as the volleyball team takes on Pacific at 6:00 pm MT in Hamilton Gym.

(Note: UC San Diego and UC Santa Barbara are joining the conference in 2027.)

Here are a few thoughts on each of the members to get the juices flowing:

St. Mary’s Gaels – Now that the Zags have left the conference, St. Mary’s thinks they are the next big thing. Their inflated self-assessment only results in annual disappointment. Ever been to Moraga, California? Great views but nobody’s home. Nightlife and entertainment are as scarce as their wins against the Zags.

Santa Clara Broncos – Always a bridesmaid, never the bride. Hope springs eternal in this Silicon Valley burb. Ever been afraid to use the wrong fork or spill red wine on a white tablecloth? Don’t drop a gum wrapper here or you go to Jesuit jail. Earn a degree, and you have to land a job in neighboring Palo Alto to justify the inflated tuition.

Loyola Marymount Lions – Welcome to fires, crime, earthquakes, and LA traffic. Some students miss their first semester because they can’t find a parking space. Kids who can’t get into USC for film and media go here. Former head basketball coach Paul Westhead showed that not even 100 points could insulate the Lions from chronic losses.

Pepperdine Waves – Imagine narrowing your freshman pool to Turning Point surfers who can’t drink, seek social isolation, and enjoy surroundings they could never afford. This is the perfect spot for kids on Adderall. But hey, at least the campus is idyllic.

University of Portland Pilots – If you like flannel and grunge, this is the top destination. Wool beanies dominate a school body named after a neighboring airport. The surroundings would be worth exploring if you didn’t have to dodge the syringes and raindrops.

University of San Diego Toreros – Smug, yes. The weather is perfect, yes. The campus is beautiful, yes. Their academics are solid. How do USD students work toward their dreams when they are already living them? All the more reason to wipe that smile off their face.

University of San Francisco Dons – Perfect if you want a fallback school in the Bay Area. Or hordes of tourists (and traffic) trying to locate the Golden Gate Bridge. Bill Russell played here…70 years ago. The Eastern Richmond neighborhood is removed from the San Francisco core and has a more suburban feel – think Stepford Wives…or Lakewood.

Pacific University – The wayward conference member somehow always finds a way back to the WCC. WCC members invited them back for easy wins. While the ‘Pacific’ name sounds nice, they are in Stockton. Said one Reddit user, “It is dirty, unfriendly, and has a milieu of aggression and DGAF attitudes amongst everyone.” The city filed for bankruptcy in 2012. After mountains of research, we can find no redeeming qualities for the locale or the school. This is the West Coast version of the University of Illinois Chicago (UIC) Flames.

Seattle University Redhawks – After years of pleading, they are back in the WCC. A distant cousin to the City of Denver, Seattle has the Space Needle and no sunshine.  The campus sits on a postage stamp and is shrouded by clouds, tech-bros, and nose rings. Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) is solved by one semester and a rapid transfer out of the Emerald City.