Preview: DU Women’s Lax Gets USC in Semis

Thanks to Thursday night’s victory over UC-Davis, DU Women’s Lax will advance to the MPSF semifinals against undefeated USC (17-0).

So what do we know about USC?

It’s a private football school that also offers academics. One of their football coaches was removed because he was drinking before, during, and after games. O.J. went there. Most students go there because it is easier to spell than UCLA. The University neighborhood is known as Fortress USC – with an accompanying  high crime rate. Want a job in LA? It is known as the ‘University of Special Connections’ – which is better than its other nickname, ‘the University of Spoiled Children’. 

As fun as it is to bash USC, they’re undefeated – barely. Colorado had them beat with a goal at 8-8 with time running out. But the winning goal by CU was called off because of a called dangerous shot attempt – like I mentioned, USC is in familiar territory with dangerous shot attempts. In women’s lacrosse, the rule is put in place to prevent injuries to defenders who are in shooting space. In the subsequent forty seconds of the Colorado contest, the Trojans were able to evade CU’s defense and net the actual game-winner 9-8.

USC’s colors are cardinal and gold and DU’s are crimson and gold. USC’s red is called ‘cardinal’ (Pantone 201C) while DU’s red is called ‘crimson’ (Pantone 202C). Following that reasoning, expect a close game, too. 17-0 is an excellent record but all good things must come to an end. Expect the Palo Alto crowd to be rooting for the crimson – not cardinal (small ‘c’), even though they are the Cardinal. Confusing, right? But the Cardinal want to be known as the California women’s lax power so there is no room for USC.

DU will win and snap USC’s winning streak – guaranteed.

DU has the advantage of experience – DU was founded in 1864 and USC was founded in 1880. That’s 12 years – a big margin. While USC can challenge DU in the name game department with Kaitlin Couture and Eggy Pastaras, DU can counter with Riley Eggeman and a double Knott (Ellie & Kate). Edge to Denver. The game is at Maloney Field at Laird Q. Cagan Stadium. DU is comfortable in an environment when every piece of wood, stucco, stone, or brick has a donor name.

Finally, there is the Anthony “Tony” Capo mob effect. USC has 8 women from New Jersey while Denver has three – advantage Pioneers.

Final score – DU 11 – USC 9.

2 thoughts on “Preview: DU Women’s Lax Gets USC in Semis”

  1. Very funny 5b, but your reasoning is somewhat off kilter. Luckily, helmets are not used now: how would the 8 Jersey girls get their teased hair in them. However the gum chewing Hollywood imports pack heat, wear brass knuckles, and have sticks sharp as knives. We will go down fighting and bleeding, but I think we go down 14-8.

    Liked by 1 person

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