Category Archives: Satire

CC’s Robson Arena Groundbreaking Postponed

A scheduled groundbreaking ceremony for a new, Colorado College on-campus hockey arena, Robson Arena, was postponed indefinitely Saturday afternoon when outgoing Colorado College President Jill Tiefenthaler’s missing 2018 Range Rover was discovered in the construction site. Tiefenthaler, who was recently named the new CEO of National Geographic Society in January of 2020, was set to leave Colorado College in August of 2020, but obviously, her map-reading skills still need some work or the Delta House Chapter has been reactivated. Continue reading CC’s Robson Arena Groundbreaking Postponed

New North Dakota Scoreboard Displaces Duo

You may have heard about the new massive scoreboard at the University of North Dakota’s Ralph Englestad Arena. However, the change has caused some unintended consequences.

The old scoreboard was operated by Raymond Schmidt and Dewey Olson. Both men scaled the 65-foot ladder two hours before each game and manually inserted score, time outs and shots-on-goal for the Fighting Hawks. Continue reading New North Dakota Scoreboard Displaces Duo

UMass-Amherst Seeks Comfort Following Last Season’s NCAA Championship Loss

These days, many universities are teeming with emotional support animals. The University of Massachusetts-Amherst leads the pack. According to a recent article, at the University of Massachusetts – Amherst, emotional support animals skyrocketed from five in the fall of 2015 to 118 two years later before dipping to the current 83. Among the Minutemen menagerie in that time are “Miniature pig, bearded dragons, geckos, rats, and birds,” according to university spokeswoman Mary Dettloff. Continue reading UMass-Amherst Seeks Comfort Following Last Season’s NCAA Championship Loss

Colorado College Enjoying Season-Long Gold Pan Celebration

Photo: Colorado College hockey players revel in last season’s ‘championship moment’ 

“We’ve added the 2018-2019 Gold Pan banner to our 43 other participation banners,” said hockey head coach Mike Haviland in a Colorado College press release earlier this year. The announcement outlined a year-long celebration commemorating last season’s series win against Denver. Continue reading Colorado College Enjoying Season-Long Gold Pan Celebration

Fan Recognition Event Backfires on North Dakota Officials

A fan recognition event at the University of North Dakota’s Ralph Englestad Arena backfired last weekend. The University’s eight hockey championship banners have been relocated to an arena wall. However, five of the banners, formerly showing the Fighting Sioux logo, have been changed to celebrate the rich history of the Fighting Hawk program and, specifically, their fans. Continue reading Fan Recognition Event Backfires on North Dakota Officials